Hungry Mommy

After waiting far too long past lunch at the doctor's office, my little girl hears my tummy grumbling, and says "Look, you're hungry and I'm tired, let's just get dressed and get out of here!"

Nap Boycott

Mom: If you don't lay down and take a nap then we won't go to the pumpkin patch today.
Daughter: Well then I guess we aren't decorating the house for Halloween!

I wish I was making this stuff up!

Dads Man Hands

My little girl and her friends were giggling about their newly painted nails, so I jumped right in to tease them and said OH look at MY painted nails too! They all jumped back and said EWWW your fingers are all hairy!

Wheres My Dolly

When Santa asked my daughter what she wanted and she told him a dolly with a pink dress, she then asked, well where is it? LOL. Such a logical girl. We tell her gifts come from Santa and there she was seeing Santa so she expected her gift.

Sorry Mom

When I was a kid I told my mom to tell me I was adopted because I didn't want to think about my parents doing it. What a rotten kid I was!

Bratty Kid

But Mom, we didn't come to the circus for the show, we came here to BUY things!!!

Kid Overshare

My daughter was telling the other kids at the bus stop about how hairy my belly was. Another girl giggled and told everyone that while her dad is walking around in his underpants she gives him a wedgie!